Tuesday, 22 July 2008

Me & the puffins



Those that know me will know that I have a liking for puffins. For watching / looking at puffins, not eating them as they don't taste that good (yes, I really have tried).

Anyhow, I've wondered for a while if there was any particular reason why and having recently returned from a puffin watching holiday, I think I've remembered at least some of the reasons. I see some areas of similarity between me & the puffin, as well as some areas of difference.

Have you ever watched a puffin take of or land? Not for them the graceful flight or powerful soaring of eagles. Take-off's appear to resemble throwing yourself off the edge of the cliff and then flapping for all you're worth. Landing appears to be stopping yourself by sticking your feet out as you hit the nearest rock or entering your burrow bottom-first. No grace, no obvious display of power or majestic swooping. The apparent throw yourself off the cliff, flap like fury to fly, land by hitting something solid to land technique quite clearly ought not to work. They're often called the clowns of the air and it's easy to see why.

I guess the reason I can associate with this is that I often feel like I'm flapping furiously, lacking graceful majesty or obvious power. As I spent an extraordinary length of time (and vast amounts of film) observing my comical friends a few years ago on the Treshnish Isles, off Mull, it occurred to me that these creatures really don't appear to belong in the sky. They just look so out of place.

I often feel as though I'm a bit of a fraud. Somehow, I do the equivalent of throwing myself off the cliff, landing by hitting solid ground, flapping like whatever in between and somehow getting away with it. I don't deserve to be where I am now. I ought to have failed far more spectacularly. I see the many greater people around, many of them good friends, and I see more eagle-like soaring and I assume (rightly or wrongly) through their greater ability or competence. Then I look at the good stuff, where I have succeeded or at least got away with it, and I wonder how on earth I've done as well as I have.

If I'm being realistic, I guess that my image of others soaring eagle-like may actually be less realistic than I imagine. But that shouldn't stop me trying. I may not be an eagle, but I could be a better puffin.

1 comment:

Graeme Smith said...

So I'm a puffin! Here I was thinking I was the only fake eagle out there!