Having been "promoted to Glory" as we in The Salvation Army put it, just as she was due to return home, it appears that some amazing things have been happening. One song that has been much quoted says
When the sun's shining down on me,
When the world's 'all as it should be',
Blessèd be Your name.
And blessèd be Your name
On the road marked with suffering,
Though there's pain in the offering,
Blessèd be Your name.
The worship group I lead on Sunday evenings sang that yesterday. I felt we needed to. They didn't know Jo of course, and really it's impossible to explain 'Jo Norton' to anyone that hasn't had that experience. But it can be helpful just to say or sing things that you need to believe.
There are a number of Bible verses that have jumped out at me including Philippians 1:21 "to live is Christ... to die is gain". Life is being Christ to those that don't yet know Him, and to those that do - but Jo has the good bit, the gain of death. Romans 8:28 tells us that in all things God works for the good of those that love & follow Him - we've seen at least a glimpse of that.
I don't know what to think just now. I only seem to feel emotion about this when I speak about it. I have an even greater urge to return to what I have to confess as my spiritual home of Wandsworth Salvation Army / Boiler Room. But that may be tainted by current emotion as well as disillusion with my current situation. Sometimes I think that I'm needed there, but at the same time think that I'd no longer have a place.
Grief is confusing. Especially when you don't even know if you have a right to grieve for someone you haven't spent that much time with in the last 8 years. But that will settle with time I guess - it will all make more sense. So best stop waffling
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